Yes, We Love You – Loving Someone With a Mental Illness

We care. Sometimes it is hard for us to be able to handle, but we never want to stop being there. We recognise that in this situation, no one truly has it harder than you do. You are the one going through the days feeling as though you have no control over your present situation. We still want to be there.

Sometimes it feels like we are holding on to a rope that is going to break at any second with you at the other end of it. You want to run away from us sometimes. We get that. We can seem overbearing in the way we are constantly on your back making sure that you are okay. I promise that we do not mean to be so intrusive. There is just no way that we would allow that rope to break.

It seems like sometimes we get mad at you. It is frustrating when you are angry at us, so we get mad. It is frustrating when you don’t want to speak to us, so we get mad. It is frustrating when we see you having to struggle through everyday, so we get mad. We are never mad at you. We are mad at the illness. We are mad at ourselves sometimes that we cannot provide all of the treatment that you will ever need. We are mad that you feel this way and there is nothing that we can do about it. It is not you, it is the illness that we want to scream at.

We know what we have gotten ourselves into. We are well aware because you have already told us. If we didn’t run away then, we probably aren’t going to run away now. You might even get mad at yourself sometimes. You might get mad because you recognise when you get angry or are mean to us. You might get mad because you recognise that we are hurt when you can’t find the strength to talk to us. You might get mad because you feel like you are a burden to us. You are not a burden at all. We wouldn’t try to be there for you as much as possible if it felt like you were. Don’t beat yourself up for not being 100% perfect all the time. You are perfect the way you are, you wouldn’t be yourself if you were any different.

I am sure that there are many people that will look at you and think that you would be so great if you didn’t have this affliction. You probably feel this way too. No one should plagued with such a terrible illness, but look at the way it has made you a stronger person. Look at the way that it has shown you how to get yourself through situations that you never thought possible. Look at the wonderful person that you are and know that you are not failing. You are growing. You are continuing to grow. You are the ones teaching us, we are not teaching you.

Yes, it does hurt. Yes, it is frustrating. Yes, we sometimes have to miss you. Yes, we love you. This isn’t a piece to tell you that we will help bring you out of your illness. Unfortunately we both know that won’t happen. We just want to let you know that we never stop caring, you are stronger than you can ever imagine, and we wouldn’t change the person that you are for anything. You, with the good and the bad, is the only version of you that we will ever want.

10 Things You Probably Shouldn’t Do, But You Do Anyway

I should probably try to correct this. I can, but I won’t. Thank you very much!

1. Your Perfume/Cologne Habit Has Gone Haywire:
I know I should be using it behind my ears, my wrist, and all those other places that only allow for a little spritz, but I do not feel right unless the scent covers my whole entire body and everyone smells it. Hey, you should be grateful, its better than smelling bad.

2. Buying Unnecessary Items at The Grocery Store:
I will not apologize for this! That $20 smoked salmon and random jar of what is it called was calling to me. I will figure out how to use all of the food when I fully process how much of my paycheck went to salmon.

3. Being Rude To At Least One Person Everyday:
You may not notice when you do this, but you do. It could be that look that you gave that lady from across the subway platform. Maybe you did not say thank you when the barista gave you your coffee. Either way you’re a bitch, but its not really the time to correct all that every single time!

4. Leaving Dirty Clothes Anywhere But in Your Hamper:
When I get home from work, my clothes just come off wherever I am standing and fall wherever I fling them. Those sweatpants have been calling my name all day. I see the dirty shirt on the floor, but I think I will revisit that in about a week.

5. Making An Excuse to Get Out of Going Out:
Sometimes, the cure for the weekend blues in Netflix. Why would I want to get out of my sweatpants when there is no one to judge me when I am at home? You may want to hangout with me, but I want to hangout with my friends Ben & Jerry.

6. Leaving The Garbage for Someone Else to Take Out:
I took it out last time! Ok no I didn’t, but you are better taking out the garbage. You are great, thanks for helping me out, love you, bye!

7. Having Way Too Many Drinks:
I say this every time. “Oh thank you, but I am not really drinking today.” “I will only have two drinks.” “I am not looking to get drunk.” You might not bee seeking to get drunk, but you will. Its ok though because there are only so many times when that behavior is still considered appropriate. Use all of your finite instances wisely!

8. Telling Your Boss You Are Sick When You Aren’t:
Listen, I just need this one day to finish this season of Scandal. If you let this happen, my life will be complete. Consider my well-being as well as the well-being of Olivia Pope in you decision to fire me.

9. Buying Clothing You May Never Wear Just Because It Is On Sale:
Umm, I’m pretty sure there is only one Macy’s One Day Sale. If I do not get this during the sale, I won’t have something to fill that extra hanger in my closet. Let me at least pretend I have style!

10. Social Media Stalking Someone:
How else am I supposed to know that the girl that I went to High School with had a baby? I have nothing going on in my life I need to talk about something!